Living Beyond Yourself Introduction and Start Day
I am a few days late in beginning this study, but better late than never. I wasn't sure what I wanted to post on this first blog. I created the blogging account for the specific purpose of writing while doing the study, so that I can share it with others and look back over myself. The first assignment for this week is to write in the beginning of our book a letter to God telling Him why I am taking the study, what I hope to learn from it, and asking for His presence and blessing over it. I have decided to make this letter my first blogging entry.
For those of you who know nothing about Beth Moore studies, they are notorious for being homework extensive. The week is broken up into five days of homework, traditionally Monday through Friday. Each day's homework takes approximately 45 minutes to an hour to complete; the more you get into it, the longer it takes. In past studies I have done, like this one, I have started at 45 minutes to an hour a day and found myself so hungry and so fascinated by the Word and all that it said that my study times increased and sometimes I would spend several hours in the Word and just meditating on the wonderful things that I had learned. Currently I am home schooling my youngest daughter, I work part time, and am a full time college student working on a Ph.D. in health psychology. I have three dogs and a young adult daughter that I spend a great deal of time with. I also teach a Sunday school class at church and organize quarterly teacher trainings at the church. I am involved in our praise and worship and am currently pursuing ministerial licensing so I can complete internship hours toward becoming a hospital chaplain. WHEW! I am tired just writing it all. So why in the world would I commit to an in-depth study of this magnitude?
We spent 8 years living in Germany. During those 8 years I spent hour upon hour in the Word of God, doing structured studies like this. During that time in my life God moved in such a wonderful way. I was closer to Him than I ever remember being in my life. Since living in the states I have become preoccupied with the pursuit of other things and neglected the study and application of God's Word with the passion I once had; it has been felt in my relationship with the Lord. I miss my God. I miss the quiet times when I would read His Word and it would just wash over me. I miss the long discussions we would have as a truth would begin to live and breath inside of me and I understood it within the context of all that was happening in my life. I miss the passion I had to speak the word to anyone or anything that would listen, even the dogs. I miss the closeness I felt as He would wrap His arms around me, hold me close, and speak His Word in my ear and it would resonate within my heart. Nothing can replace that intimacy! I am doing the study to rediscover that connection and know the quiet and remarkable awe that lives inside of me as I rest in the promises and renewal of His Word.
Recently I was reading about how Israel lost a battle to the Philistines because they went to war without the presence of God. They didn't have His ark with them and even though they went proclaiming His name, they went without His presence. I began to think about what this meant to me. The ark of the Covenant had a lid and on the lid was the mercy seat, it was within the mercy seat that the glory of God would come to rest; within the ark was the Ten Commandments, a jar of manna, and Aaron's budded rod. As I meditated on this I began to wonder how I could have the glory of God in my life is I kept trying to separate it from His Word. I wanted Jesus as my mercy seat and the glory of God to dwell within me and on me but I also wanted it without the time spent in His Word or in the application of His Word. I professed His name and went out with the pretense of His glory but failed to recognize the departure of the glory that had taken place, my life was being marked with Ichabod, the place where God's glory once dwelt but was no more. His glory and His presence cannot be separated from His Word; when that takes place we lose access to His daily provision (the manna) as well as His protection and guidance (Aaron's rod) because they all accompany one another, the Word of the Lord, the presence of Christ, the provision of God, the protection and guidance He provides, and His glory. If the Word of God is not a part of my daily life I can safely assume that none of the others are present either.
I am desiring to see within myself the God given potential that I see in so many others around me. Living Beyond Yourself is an excellent place to begin as I learn about the power of living in the Spirit and give priority to the Word of God in my life once again, with both passion and purpose.
Abba Daddy,
Let Your Word live and breath inside of me as I do this study. Be with me during this time. I surrender every area of my life and ask that You would search through it, rightly dividing it with the Word. Use Your Word to sanctify me and wash over me that I would become more like You. I ask that this time of study would be a time we would become closer as I learn more about You and Your lavish love for me. Let there be less and less of me and so much more of You. In Jesus name, AMEN!
